How to survive the mental pressures of being a new mother

St Vesti Boutique @ Dec 05, 2023

As a mother, you devote your time and energy to taking care of your family's needs. However, it's crucial to remember that taking care of yourself is just as important. Self-care is not a luxury but a necessity for your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. In article will explore various self-care practices that can help you recharge, manage stress, and find balance in your busy life. Additionally, we will delve into the power of faith-based elements in enhancing your self-care journey, allowing you to connect with your spirituality and find deeper fulfilment.

Most young mums feel lonely; others struggle with everything from self-doubt to depression. There are ways to bounce back

Research by the Co-op and the Red Cross has revealed the unhappiness experienced by new mothers. Some 82% of those under 30 reported feeling lonely some of the time, with 43% saying they often or always felt that way. Postnatal depression(PND) affects 10-15% of women and is a recognised mental health condition that can be treated. But what if you are one of the many more women who just find new motherhood much harder than you had thought? Here are some tips to protect your mental health.

Sleep

“I think the overarching problem is tiredness, and when we’re tired we tend to react more emotionally,” says clinical psychologist Linda Blair, author of The Happy Child. “That’s why napping is so important. I would vote for any mother whose baby has finally got to sleep to lie down immediately rather than clean up. I don’t care if they have to trip over old food plates.”

Tackle loneliness

Baby groups or pram-friendly exercise classes are good places to make friends – it can feel weird to ask for numbers, but be brave. And stay in touch with your pre-baby circle, adds Annie Belasco, of Pre and Postnatal Depression Advice and Support. “It doesn’t matter if they have children – it can be a distraction from life that can be ruled by children’s routines.”

Try not to mourn the ‘old’ you

Some women may feel detached from their “old” life, or miss it. You could view it as a loss of identity, says Blair, but “watch your language. Instead of talking about loss, talk about change or even addition. We don’t have one identity – we have many, depending on who we’re referring to when we describe ourselves.”

Talk about how you feel

A study last year by the National Childbirth Trust found that while half of new mothers experienced poor mental health in pregnancy or for the first year after the birth of their child, 46% of those did not tell health professionals, fearing they would be considered incapable. If you notice signs of PND – such as low mood that lasts for two weeks or more, difficulty sleeping or difficulty bonding with your baby – or have thoughts of hurting yourself or others, you need professional help. But if you are just struggling a bit, it can be useful, says Blair, to talk to those “who have been through the experience you’re going through”.

Belasco suggests seeking out other people’s stories online. “They can be relatable, and soothing.” But be careful of comparisons. Perfect images on social media can make it seem as if everyone else has cracked sleeping/feeding/leaving the house with a fully dressed baby. It is not true.

Beware becoming overwhelmed

It is only relatively recently that new mothers (and sometimes fathers) have been expected, or expect, to raise their babies in isolation. “Delegate boring tasks, or be prepared to let housework go,” says Blair. “If you have a partner, it’s important that the partner has a share of the caring, which makes it easier for the baby to get used to other loving types of care.”

Remember it will pass

This can be difficult but it is important to keep perspective. “Time slows down when you’re tired and trying to learn something new, so it’s compounded with the care of a child,” says Blair. “When you look back, it won’t have been a very long time when you felt in enforced isolation. So remind yourself this isn’t going to last for ever.”

Faith-Based Perspective: Connecting with Your Spirituality

Deepening your connection with your faith can enhance your self-care practices. Take time for prayer, meditation, or spiritual reflection to nurture your faith. Seek solace and guidance in religion, and allow your faith to serve as a source of strength and comfort. Engaging in religious or spiritual activities that resonate with you can provide a profound sense of peace and renewal.

Self-care is an essential aspect of motherhood, allowing you to nurture your well-being and find balance amidst the demands of daily life. By prioritizing mindfulness exercises, engaging in physical activities, and nurturing your hobbies, you can recharge and replenish your energy. Furthermore, incorporating faith-based elements into your self-care journey can deepen your connection with your spirituality, bringing a sense of peace and purpose. Remember, taking care of yourself is not selfish but a vital part of being the best version of yourself for your family. Embrace self-care as a necessary and empowering practice that allows you to thrive as a mother and a woman.

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Posted in: Mothers, Self Care, St Vesti Articles

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